last broadcast

This is my last post in Ust, and possibly my last in Kazakhstan. I know it's been infrequent, but, I hope, entertaining and informative. I'll keep the blog going I guess to talk about my deeper revalations about myself as I continue to study.

Yesterday my teachers at the school had a goodbye party for me. It was really nice of them, especially since I know many of them are very strapped for money during this season of planting. The said many toasts to me, many well-wishes, and I, of course, had to drink with all of them. The wine was abundantly flowing. They gave me some really cool parting gifts: a silver necklace, a photo album, and a really cool color copy of Pushkin's Stories, which they all signed.

Inessa gave me a nice beerstein and carved a message in the bottom. It said, "to remember me a long time from Inessa." I don't think I can ever forget her, especially when I'm drinking beer from it - just not to much though, then I will forget...everything.

Tonight we are going out for the last time, then I've got to go back to my village because Nina and Kolya are having a goodbye dinner for me. She's making roast chicken and potatoes in a garlic sauce that I particularly like. Today I'm trying to send the last of my packages of sweaters and stuff that I can't fit in my bag, pawn the stuff that I can, and give away the rest. All before four o'clock.

I'm leaving out of Ust on Tuesday by train to Almaty. And the flight from Almaty leaves on the 11th. Our country director, Kris Besch, has reached the end of her position too, and she'll be on the same flight. I might be one of the last volunteers to leave, out of those that didn't extend their service. I can't believe it's coming so soon. I want to go home, but I want to stay too. There are things that I'll miss and things that I won't; things that I dread about going back to America, and things I would love to experience again. All in all, I know that I could live anywhere. Home truly is where the heart is, and a part of my heart will always be in Kazakhstan, with some of the people here, with the volunteers here in my Oblast, with Inessa, with my old teachers, and host family. It will be great to see my family and friends again, because I know I'll rediscover that piece of my heart that they still have. And as I continue to live and move around, I'll continue to divide my heart, causing it to grow larger, and hoping and praying that I will be able to pick up those pieces of my heart again. I'll never leave Kazakhstan, a part of me will always be here. Maybe someday I can come back.